By Maggie Jones
When I get down on myself and feel the world is mad at me, when I also need to push up and try my best. I don't feel that was enough to get myself out of a dark hole that was filled up with grief and upsetting times.
I felt the world was on my shoulders weighing me down and no one seemed to understand. Inside me was something that I wanted to give to the world that I knew needed me the most. A world that is my home, Planet Earth. I know and truly believed the power of good was inside, wanting and waiting to come out of me. My gifts of talent, and my gifts that offer help to people and give from my heart and mind and spirit.
I feel and always believed God gave me the wings of courage to help and to give it my all to do what is the next right thing when it sometimes seems all hope is lost. You get back up and try to keep persistent and never give up what you know deep inside is right. What you were taught by your parents is a gift of knowledge to you alongside love is a gift of wisdom. You have the gift of strength when it seems impossible but it isn’t, you give all you got with all your might to help a lot of people.
I can say to you that my positive self is doing rightful things and has true God given potential to anything good you put and set your mind to.
I am autistic, and I can achieve anything like everyone I know and don't know. We are all made of differences that make us unique and gifted and beautiful inside and outside. We are human, and it's okay to make a mistake. We would not be human if we didn’t make a single mistake. I know in my belief it was made by God that suffered, died, and arose again on the third day, so all men can make a mistake and learn from it, and let it go. Knowing that God is merciful all around. He forgives all that you do wrong but tries to learn from it and do better.
If my positive self can do it, I know I can with a little help. It is good to ask for help so you know for the next time. If you don't know how to do things, asking for help is a must to better understand what you're doing.
I feel I'm giving it my all when I do my best everyday. I can celebrate what I have accomplished over the past two years of the covid-19 pandemic and its different strains. It was so hard when I wasn't going outside, and seeing people that I know everyday. And so many people passed away from covid -19, and it had a toll on me, like many people did, from nurses, doctors, first responders, to front line workers. I thought I was having it hard myself, when I found out I was not the only one in a dark hole. People were getting sick really bad, and dying. I watched the horror on the nurses’ and doctors’ faces and imagined how they suffered mentally. When they see a person that passed away on a hospital bed from covid-19 or dying, it really hits me hard. Because I feel I need to know what is the right and responsible way at the time, to keep myself safe and healthy. And my family is safe as well. And everyone around me too. Because I care.
Things that you want to achieve in life are very hard. But you have to believe and not give in to your fear and say I can do this. Think of all who achieved it. It was hard, but they did it anyway because it is the right thing to do. Think of how man got to the moon then to Mars with a rover. Think of paintings painted by artists who went beyond their imagination , And look at people who became teachers, doctors, nurses and so many things to be said. We can't give up on our fears because we are afraid of making a mistake or something happening not our way at first. We keep going knowing in our hearts it is the right thing to do. And don't just say I can't, because it's hard. It's time for you to do with the God given potential that you have to use part of it is your brain and common sense. I know in my heart God listens with his merciful heart like I said before.
And if an autistic person like me can do it and a person with disabilities can do this so can everyone. I feel like I can do more and help people. I care about how I treat other people, and I also think that I can make a difference in someone's life because I know I have a loving caring heart.
I believe my positive self can be happy with being herself and trying to do what I know is right, and I know in my heart, we can change our negativity about other people and things turn around for the better. This is how I feel about things the way they are in a positive way. I will not turn back and keep going and trying and doing better to succeed in my life with autism. I will do my best and move forward with my gift to the world that sits around me. Filled with life and happiness with a hug waiting for me at the front door of my house from my mom. And when I need help I can ask for help from a friend or family member.
Having autism isn’t terrible to have for me. I just work around it with the best of my abilities and hard work.